The Singer's Song

Two weeks ago, shockwaves hit America as the nation was informed that one of its most beloved characters is a tool of the homosexual lobby. On December 20, The New York Times quoted Dr. James C. Dobson, who leads the conservative group Focus on the Family, as saying that SpongeBob Squarepants had been enlisted in a “pro-homosexual video” along with such other moral subversives like Jimmy Neutron and Barney. Dobson’s assistant, Paul Batura, echoed this sentiment, calling the video “an insidious means by which the organization is manipulating and potentially brainwashing kids.” In retribution, Vanity Fair Contributing Editor James Wolcott bestowed a new epithet upon Dr. Dobson: “SpongeDob Stickypants.”

This is not the first time that a leader of the religious right has caused a furor over allegations of homosexuality among children’s characters. Bert and Ernie were accused of carrying on an illicit relationship in a bid to ban the two from North Carolina’s airwaves in 1994 and The Lion King’s Timon and Pumbaa were attacked a year later (both by the same man, one Reverend Joseph Chambers of Charlotte, N.C.). More recently, in 1999 the Reverend Jerry Falwell outed Tinky Winky, the purple Teletubby.

It’s bad enough when such attacks come from the Religious Right; it’s almost expected of them to cry wolf every once and a while as a cathartic moment to ease their pent up aggression. When such actions are taken by a member of the Administration, however, it’s an entirely different story.

In one of her first actions as Secretary of Education, Margaret Spellings went on the cultural offensive against the homosexual movement by threatening PBS against running certain cartoon. What, exactly, was Ms. Spellings’ qualm about the program? Postcards From Buster, a spin-off of the popular Arnold series, features an animated rabbit named Buster who visits real children around the country. In the offending episode, entitled “Sugartime!,” Buster and his father visit the state of Vermont where they meet two actual children who have gay parents. Talk about a controversy! After receiving a letter from Ms. Spellings, PBS CEO Pat Mitchell announced that the episode had coincidentally been nixed just hours earlier.

There are serious problems in the nation today and few could prove as detrimental to America’s prosperity as the declining and crumbling public education system. President Bush’s horribly underfunded No Child Left Behind law is bleeding school districts across the country dry through testing requirements without sufficient money for implementation, and schools are finding it increasingly difficult to have less than 40 students in each classroom. Why is it, then, that the most important priority of the new Education Secretary is to advance a moral crusade? Perhaps Ms. Spellings should spend a little more time trying to improve the nation’s schools before seeking out a culture war, though it would be preferable if she would leave the latter to the likes of Dobson and Falwell.

This article originally appeared in the February 2, 2005 edition of The Collage, a student newspaper covering the Claremont Colleges